by Mark Twain

[NOTE.--I translated a portion of this diary some years ago, and

a friend of mine printed a few copies in an incomplete form, but

the public never got them. Since then I have deciphered some more

of Adam's hieroglyphics, and think he has now become sufficiently

important as a public character to justify this publication.--M. T.]


This new creature with the long hair is a good deal in the way.

It is always hanging around and following me about. I don't like

this; I am not used to company. I wish it would stay with the

other animals. Cloudy to-day, wind in the east; think we shall

have rain.... Where did I get that word?... I remember now

--the new creature uses it.


Been examining the great waterfall. It is the finest thing on the

estate, I think. The new creature calls it Niagara Falls--why,

I am sure I do not know. Says it looks like Niagara Falls. That

is not a reason; it is mere waywardness and imbecility. I get no

chance to name anything myself. The new creature names everything

that comes along, before I can get in a protest. And always that

same pretext is offered--it looks like the thing. There is the

dodo, for instance. Says the moment one looks at it one sees at

a glance that it "looks like a dodo." It will have to keep that

name, no doubt. It wearies me to fret about it, and it does no

good, anyway. Dodo! It looks no more like a dodo than I do.


Built me a shelter against the rain, but could not have it to

myself in peace. The new creature intruded. When I tried to put

it out it shed water out of the holes it looks with, and wiped it

away with the back of its paws, and made a noise such as some of

the other animals make when they are in distress. I wish it would

not talk; it is always talking. That sounds like a cheap fling

at the poor creature, a slur; but I do not mean it so. I have never

heard the human voice before, and any new and strange sound

intruding itself here upon the solemn hush of these dreaming

solitudes offends my ear and seems a false note. And this new

sound is so close to me; it is right at my shoulder, right at my

ear, first on one side and then on the other, and I am used only

to sounds that are more or less distant from me.


The naming goes recklessly on, in spite of anything I can do. I

had a very good name for the estate, and it was musical and pretty

--GARDEN-OF-EDEN. Privately, I continue to call it that, but not

any longer publicly. The new creature says it is all woods and

rocks and scenery, and therefore has no resemblance to a garden.

Says it looks like a park, and does not look like anything but a

park. Consequently, without consulting me, it has been new-named

--NIAGARA FALLS PARK. This is sufficiently high-handed, it seems to

me. And already there is a sign up:



My life is not as happy as it was.


The new creature eats too much fruit. We are going to run short,

most likely. "We" again--that is its word; mine too, now, from

hearing it so much. Good deal of fog this morning. I do not go

out in the fog myself. The new creature does. It goes out in

all weathers, and stumps right in with its muddy feet. And talks.

It used to be so pleasant and quiet here.


Pulled through. This day is getting to be more and more trying.

It was selected and set apart last November as a day of rest. I

already had six of them per week, before. This morning found the

new creature trying to clod apples out of that forbidden tree.


The new creature says its name is Eve. That is all right, I have

no objections. Says it is to call it by when I want it to come.

I said it was superfluous, then. The word evidently raised me in

its respect; and indeed it is a large, good word, and will bear

repetition. It says it is not an It, it is a She. This is probably

doubtful; yet it is all one to me; what she is were nothing to me

if she would but go by herself and not talk.


She has littered the whole estate with execrable names and offensive





She says this park would make a tidy summer resort, if there was

any custom for it. Summer resort--another invention of hers--just

words, without any meaning. What is a summer resort? But it is

best not to ask her, she has such a rage for explaining.


She has taken to beseeching me to stop going over the Falls. What

harm does it do? Says it makes her shudder. I wonder why. I have

always done it--always liked the plunge, and the excitement, and

the coolness. I supposed it was what the Falls were for. They

have no other use that I can see, and they must have been made for

something. She says they were only made for scenery--like the

rhinoceros and the mastodon.

I went over the Falls in a barrel--not satisfactory to her. Went

over in a tub--still not satisfactory. Swam the Whirlpool and the

Rapids in a fig-leaf suit. It got much damaged. Hence, tedious

complaints about my extravagance. I am too much hampered here.

What I need is change of scene.


I escaped last Tuesday night, and travelled two days, and built

me another shelter, in a secluded place, and obliterated my tracks

as well as I could, but she hunted me out by means of a beast which

she has tamed and calls a wolf, and came making that pitiful noise

again, and shedding that water out of the places she looks with.

I was obliged to return with her, but will presentlyemigrate again,

when occasion offers. She engages herself in many foolish things:

among others, trying to study out why the animals called lions and

tigers live on grass and flowers, when, as she says, the sort of

teeth they wear would indicate that they were intended to eat each

other. This is foolish, because to do that would be to kill each

other, and that would introduce what, as I understand it, is called

"death;" and death, as I have been told, has not yet entered the

Park. Which is a pity, on some accounts.


Pulled through.


I believe I see what the week is for: it is to give time to rest

up from the weariness of Sunday. It seems a good idea.... She

has been climbing that tree again. Clodded her out of it. She

said nobody was looking. Seems to consider that a sufficient

justification for chancing any dangerous thing. Told her that.

The word justification moved her admiration--and envy too, I

thought. It is a good word.


She told me she was made out of a rib taken from my body. This

is at least doubtful, if not more than that. I have not missed

any rib.... She is in much trouble about the buzzard; says

grass does not agree with it; is afraid she can't raise it; thinks

it was intended to live on decayed flesh. The buzzard must get

along the best it can with what is provided. We cannot overturn

the whole scheme to accommodate the buzzard.


She fell in the pond yesterday, when she was looking at herself

in it, which she is always doing. She nearly strangled, and said

it was most uncomfortable. This made her sorry for the creatures

which live in there, which she calls fish, for she continues to

fasten names on to things that don't need them and don't come when

they are called by them, which is a matter of no consequence to

her, as she is such a numskull anyway; so she got a lot of them

out and brought them in last night and put them in my bed to keep

warm, but I have noticed them now and then all day, and I don't

see that they are any happier there than they were before, only

quieter. When night comes I shall throw them out-doors. I will

not sleep with them again, for I find them clammy and unpleasant

to lie among when a person hasn't anything on.


Pulled through.


She has taken up with a snake now. The other animals are glad,

for she was always experimenting with them and bothering them;

and I am glad, because the snake talks, and this enables me to

get a rest.


She says the snake advises her to try the fruit of that tree, and

says the result will be a great and fine and noble education. I

told her there would be another result, too--it would introduce

death into the world. That was a mistake--it had been better to

keep the remark to myself; it only gave her an idea--she could

save the sick buzzard, and furnish fresh meat to the despondent

lions and tigers. I advised her to keep away from the tree. She

said she wouldn't. I foresee trouble. Will emigrate.


I have had a variegated time. I escaped that night, and rode a

horse all night as fast as he could go, hoping to get clear out of

the Park and hide in some other country before the trouble should

begin; but it was not to be. About an hour after sunup, as I was

riding through a flowery plain where thousands of animals were

grazing, slumbering, or playing with each other, according to their

wont, all of a sudden they broke into a tempest of frightful noises,

and in one moment the plain was in a franticcommotion and every

beast was destroying its neighbor. I knew what it meant--Eve had

eaten that fruit, and death was come into the world.... The

tigers ate my horse, paying no attention when I ordered them to

desist, and they would even have eaten me if I had stayed--which

I didn't, but went away in much haste.... I found this place,

outside the Park, and was fairly comfortable for a few days, but

she has found me out. Found me out, and has named the place

Tonawanda--says it looks like that. In fact, I was not sorry she

came, for there are but meagre pickings here, and she brought some

of those apples. I was obliged to eat them, I was so hungry. It

was against my principles, but I find that principles have no real

force except when one is well fed.... She came curtained in

boughs and bunches of leaves, and when I asked her what she meant

by such nonsense, and snatched them away and threw them down, she

tittered and blushed. I had never seen a person titter and blush

before, and to me it seemed unbecoming and idiotic. She said I

would soon know how it was myself. This was correct. Hungry as

I was, I laid down the apple half eaten--certainly the best one I

ever saw, considering the lateness of the season--and arrayed

myself in the discarded boughs and branches, and then spoke to her

with some severity and ordered her to go and get some more and not

make such a spectacle of herself. She did it, and after this we

crept down to where the wild-beast battle had been, and collected

some skins, and I made her patch together a couple of suits proper

for public occasions. They are uncomfortable, it is true, but

stylish, and that is the main point about clothes. ... I find

she is a good deal of a companion. I see I should be lonesome and

depressed without her, now that I have lost my property. Another

thing, she says it is ordered that we work for our living hereafter.

She will be useful. I will superintend.

Ten Days Later

She accuses me of being the cause of our disaster! She says, with

apparent sincerity and truth, that the Serpent assured her that

the forbidden fruit was not apples, it was chestnuts. I said I

was innocent, then, for I had not eaten any chestnuts. She said

the Serpent informed her that "chestnut" was a figurative term

meaning an aged and mouldy joke. I turned pale at that, for I

have made many jokes to pass the weary time, and some of them could

have been of that sort, though I had honestlysupposed that they

were new when I made them. She asked me if I had made one just

at the time of the catastrophe. I was obliged to admit that I had

made one to myself, though not aloud. It was this. I was thinking

about the Falls, and I said to myself, "How wonderful it is to see

that vast body of water tumble down there!" Then in an instant a

bright thought flashed into my head, and I let it fly, saying, "It

would be a deal more wonderful to see it tumble up there!"--and I

was just about to kill myself with laughing at it when all nature

broke loose in war and death, and I had to flee for my life.

"There," she said, with triumph, "that is just it; the Serpent

mentioned that very jest, and called it the First Chestnut, and

said it was coeval with the creation." Alas, I am indeed to blame.

Would that I were not witty; oh, would that I had never had that

radiant thought!

Next Year

We have named it Cain. She caught it while I was up country

trapping on the North Shore of the Erie; caught it in the timber

a couple of miles from our dug-out--or it might have been four,

she isn't certain which. It resembles us in some ways, and may

be a relation. That is what she thinks, but this is an error,

in my judgment. The difference in size warrants the conclusion

that it is a different and new kind of animal--a fish, perhaps,

though when I put it in the water to see, it sank, and she plunged

in and snatched it out before there was opportunity for the

experiment to determine the matter. I still think it is a fish,

but she is indifferent about what it is, and will not let me have

it to try. I do not understand this. The coming of the creature

seems to have changed her whole nature and made her unreasonable

about experiments. She thinks more of it than she does of any of

the other animals, but is not able to explain why. Her mind is

disordered--everything shows it. Sometimes she carries the fish

in her arms half the night when it complains and wants to get to

the water. At such times the water comes out of the places in

her face that she looks out of, and she pats the fish on the back

and makes soft sounds with her mouth to soothe it, and betrays

sorrow and solicitude in a hundred ways. I have never seen her

do like this with any other fish, and it troubles me greatly. She

used to carry the young tigers around so, and play with them,

before we lost our property; but it was only play; she never took

on about them like this when their dinner disagreed with them.


She doesn't work Sundays, but lies around all tired out, and likes

to have the fish wallow over her; and she makes fool noises to

  • portion [´pɔ:ʃən] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.嫁妆;命运 vt.分配   (初中英语单词)
  • character [´kæriktə] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.特性;性质;人物;字   (初中英语单词)
  • instance [´instəns] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.例子,实例,例证   (初中英语单词)
  • distress [di´stres] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.痛苦 vt.使苦恼   (初中英语单词)
  • solemn [´sɔləm] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.严肃的;隆重的   (初中英语单词)
  • estate [i´steit] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.财产;庄园;等级   (初中英语单词)
  • musical [´mju:zikəl] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.音乐的;悦耳的   (初中英语单词)
  • therefore [´ðeəfɔ:] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.&conj.因此;所以   (初中英语单词)
  • sufficiently [sə´fiʃəntli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.充分地,足够地   (初中英语单词)
  • evidently [´evidəntli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.明显地   (初中英语单词)
  • resort [ri´zɔ:t] 移动到这儿单词发声  vi.求助;乞灵;诉诸   (初中英语单词)
  • invention [in´venʃən] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.创造;发明;虚构   (初中英语单词)
  • plunge [plʌndʒ] 移动到这儿单词发声  v.插进 n.投入;冲击   (初中英语单词)
  • excitement [ik´saitmənt] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.兴奋;骚动;煽动   (初中英语单词)
  • supposed [sə´pəuzd] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.想象的;假定的   (初中英语单词)
  • satisfactory [,sætis´fæktəri] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.令人满意的   (初中英语单词)
  • presently [´prezəntli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.不久;目前   (初中英语单词)
  • scheme [ski:m] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.计划;阴谋,诡计   (初中英语单词)
  • yesterday [´jestədi] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.&ad.昨天;前不久   (初中英语单词)
  • consequence [´kɔnsikwəns] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.结果;后果;推断   (初中英语单词)
  • spectacle [´spektəkəl] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.展览;表演;景象   (初中英语单词)
  • companion [kəm´pæniən] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.同伴;同事;伴侣   (初中英语单词)
  • innocent [´inəsənt] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.无罪的;单纯的   (初中英语单词)
  • honestly [´ɔnistli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.诚实地,老实地   (初中英语单词)
  • instant [´instənt] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.立即的 n.紧迫;瞬间   (初中英语单词)
  • triumph [´traiəmf] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.胜利 vi.得胜,战胜   (初中英语单词)
  • hanging [´hæŋiŋ] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.绞刑 a.悬挂着的   (高中英语单词)
  • waterfall [´wɔ:təfɔ:l] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.瀑布   (高中英语单词)
  • scenery [´si:nəri] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.舞台布景   (高中英语单词)
  • resemblance [ri´zembləns] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.类似;肖像;外表   (高中英语单词)
  • consequently [´kɔnsikwəntli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.因此,所以   (高中英语单词)
  • forbidden [fə´bidn] 移动到这儿单词发声  forbid的过去分词   (高中英语单词)
  • shudder [´ʃʌdə] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.&vi.震颤;发抖   (高中英语单词)
  • pitiful [´pitifəl] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.可怜的;慈悲的   (高中英语单词)
  • doubtful [´dautful] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.怀疑的,可疑的   (高中英语单词)
  • accommodate [ə´kɔmədeit] 移动到这儿单词发声  vt.供应;容纳;调节   (高中英语单词)
  • uncomfortable [ʌn´kʌmftəbəl] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.不舒服的,不自在的   (高中英语单词)
  • tempest [´tempist] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.暴风雨   (高中英语单词)
  • frightful [´fraitfəl] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.可怕的;不愉快的   (高中英语单词)
  • frantic [´fræntik] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.发狂的;急忙的   (高中英语单词)
  • nonsense [´nɔnsəns] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.胡说 int.胡说!废话   (高中英语单词)
  • lonesome [´ləunsəm] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.孤独的;冷清清的   (高中英语单词)
  • serpent [´sə:pənt] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.大毒蛇;阴险的人   (高中英语单词)
  • saying [´seiŋ, ´sei-iŋ] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.言语;言论;格言   (高中英语单词)
  • chestnut [´tʃesnʌt] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.栗子;栗树;栗色(马)   (高中英语单词)
  • indifferent [in´difrənt] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.不关心的;中立的   (高中英语单词)
  • soothe [su:ð] 移动到这儿单词发声  vt.安慰;镇定;减轻   (高中英语单词)
  • niagara [nai´ægərə] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.尼亚加拉河   (英语四级单词)
  • trying [´traiiŋ] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.难堪的;费劲的   (英语四级单词)
  • superfluous [su:´pə:fluəs, sju:-] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.过剩的,多余的   (英语四级单词)
  • extravagance [iks´trævigəns] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.奢侈;极端   (英语四级单词)
  • weariness [wiərinis] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.疲倦;厌烦   (英语四级单词)
  • foresee [fɔ:´si:] 移动到这儿单词发声  vt.预见,预知   (英语四级单词)
  • flowery [´flauəri] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.多花的   (英语四级单词)
  • commotion [kə´məuʃən] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.混乱;骚动   (英语四级单词)
  • considering [kən´sidəriŋ] 移动到这儿单词发声  prep.就…而论   (英语四级单词)
  • severity [si´veriti] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.严厉;严重;苛刻   (英语四级单词)
  • sincerity [sin´seriti] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.真诚;诚意   (英语四级单词)
  • catastrophe [kə´tæstrəfi] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.大灾难;(悲剧)结局   (英语四级单词)
  • incomplete [,inkəm´pli:t] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.不完全的,未完成的   (英语六级单词)
  • privately [´praivitli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.秘密,一个人   (英语六级单词)
  • publicly [´pʌblikli] 移动到这儿单词发声  ad.公然;公众所有地   (英语六级单词)
  • coolness [´ku:lnis] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.凉,凉爽;冷静   (英语六级单词)
  • emigrate [´emigreit] 移动到这儿单词发声  vi.移民(外国)   (英语六级单词)
  • justification [,dʒʌstifi´keiʃən] 移动到这儿单词发声  n.辩护;根据;缘故   (英语六级单词)
  • assured [ə´ʃuəd] 移动到这儿单词发声  a.确实的 n.被保险人   (英语六级单词)
  • wallow [´wɔləu, ´wa:-] 移动到这儿单词发声  v.&n.(猪等)打滚   (英语六级单词)

  • 上传人 欢乐鱼 分享于 2017-06-26 17:34:12
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